you're only a stranger once
"Love is watching someone die"
-death cab for cutie
women: can u not touch our butts without knowing if we're okay with it? kthx.
men: modern feminism has gone TOO FAR. we already gave you THE VOTE and JOBS and now you're OPPRESSING US by assuming we're all RAPISTS. PATRIARCHY IS NOT REAL B/C NOT ALL MEN.
I’d like to cancel my subscription to Menstrual Cycle Monthly
I’m sorry, it appears you’ve taken out a fifty-sixty year subscription. However, we can pause it for nine months as long as you sign a contract that says you’ll take out a subscription to Baby Daily for at least eighteen years
Damn those Terms and Conditions.
i didn’t even read them i’ve made a terrible mistake
What they say to kids who want pets: Are you sure you're not just saying you want one because all your friends have one? Remember, it's not going to be small and cute forever, it will grow up eventually! It's a living being that will depend entirely on you for the rest of its life. Are you really sure you're ready for this?
What they say to adults who DON'T want kids: Oh, you'll want one sooner or later. Everybody does, after all. Besides, babies are soooo cute, aren't they? You'd better hurry up before you get too old!